I use ALOT of discipline strategies. Its not that my gorgeous butter-wouldn’t-melt-in-their-mouths twinnies are naughty. Its just that they just have too much energy for a person their size. Waaaaaaaaay too much energy. I’ve used 1-2-3 Magic (aka the count-down until mama loses her nut) and time-out (aka time for mama to calm down). I’ve screamed and I’ve whispered. I’ve threatened and bribed but with twins, there’s only one strategty that always seems to calm a situation. I call it “Divide and Conquer.”
When Little Mister and Miss are in that zone where they’ve got the bad case of the sillies and they are not being safe, I have to seperate them. All the above strategies just go in one ear and out the other. Its like they’re in a twilight zone and nobody exists but them. Even a smack (something that I really really try hard not to do) doesn’t snap them out of it. You have to give them both a different focus. Little Mister will be put into the bath. Little Miss is not. Little Miss gets sent to our ensuite toilet. Little Mister goes to theirs. It doesn’t sound like much of a punishment but it works. For them, being seperated is a punishment.
They no longer have day sleeps in the same room. Just nights. Depending on their energy levels, Little Mister and Miss will have seperate baths and once I left Little Mister home with the Papa Bear while I went shopping with Little Miss because he refused to get dressed. He was devasted that we went to get milk and bread without him. Of course this technique can’t be used all the time. It makes me feel like a big meanie when I seperate them…but it is still good to know
My Little Mister and Miss are obsessed with superheros at the moment. In particular, the Hulk. It could be because he’s everywhere at the moment and little kids are susceptable to marketing but I think its due to something a little more familar. Have you noticed that all Hulk does is chuck a tantie and smash things??? He gets angry and then screams incoherently. And when he is understandable, its only one syllable words??? Hulk mad! Hulk smash! I don’t know about you but this big green man reminds me of my little not-so-green man.
I’ve even started to use him as an example to get my point across when explaining emotions and why we feel this way. Hulk is mad because he hasn’t had a nap or he needs a cuddle or he’s hungry. My twinnies love it…except when they are cranky and I’m telling them it because they decided not to have a nap. Then its “I’m not cranky” and “I’m not Hulk”. Grumble grumble grumble. Throw toys. Smash toys. Sulk.
Gotta love kids
Like most mamas out there, I struggle to juggle the many balls that make our lives – home, life, husband, kids, friends, work and me. Notice how ‘me’ was dead last? Cos its the ball that gets dropped most of all. Whenever I have a ‘free’ moment, there’s always something that’s more important to do. Instead of sitting down and enjoying a cup of tea, there’s tea-on-the-go as I hang up washing, answer the phone and twin-wrangle. Its not healthy and I’m making a point of making time for me…which brings me to the mum-cation (the vacation for the mama).
First off, there are some rules. You can’t enjoy a mama-cation if the kidlets are there. Same with hubby. He can’t be there either. They need to be somewhere fun enough so you don’t feel mama-guilt but not too fun that you feel left out. It also needs to be a least an hour long AND you can’t have a to-do least that needs to be worked through. Unless that to-do list includes mani, pedi, coffee and a nap. You might need to bribe/ threaten/plead insanity to someone but the end result is worth it. I have even consider putting my twinnies into daycare just for a whole glorious day of me-time.
My go-to place for a mum-cation is the bath. A long hot soak in the tub is a fail-safe way to make sure I obey the rules. I can’t bring my laptop, phone or tablet into the bath so there’s no sneaky work emails to grab my attention, I can’t fold washing or do any other household chores and it fits into the time limit so I won’t feel rudely ripped off if the hubby & co return home early. My next trip needs to be to a hairdresser but that requires me to be a little more organised. At the moment my mum-cations are very impromptu and unplanned :-/
So what do you do for your mum-cations?